Ten Things I shall do immediately when I become President of Pakistan (or PM – whichever comes first):
- Legalize Alcohol – might as well.
- Invite the Sweedish Bikini Team (Courtesy Coors)
- Scratching/Grabbing/Massaging your private in Public – will yield to instant flogging!
- Spit Pan on a Public place and we have the equal right to spit on your face!
- It will be okay to say WTF – even on official documents. Exclamation marks can be used for emphasis!
- In order to sit on my Federal Cabinet, you MUST have an IQ of 120+. You must excel in the vertical for the Ministry under your control. You must be fluent in English – yes, we shall ask you to highlight some of the books you’ve read recently. You will have a minimum of a Masters!
- There will be NO such thing as a Police Escort. Everyone gets the same treatment.
- I shall induct a special police that will whip everyone and make sure everyone gets in line. On the road, waiting for the elevator, at the ticket counter, in the bank, etc.
- Horns will be banned. Plain and simple.
- Establish an Internet Exchange (about time!)
